It's really worth it?

I ALWAYS ASK MYSELF ABOUT FRIENDSHIP AND THE REALITY….I KNOW I CAN’T BE A GOOD FRIEND BUT I CAN’T SAY THAT I’M YOUR FRIEND BECAUSE SOMETIME I FEEL THAT WHEN I SEE PEOPLE THAT JOIN THEIR OWN KIND IT’S SAD…BECAUSE DIDN’T THEY LEARNED ANYTHING FROM ORIENTATION THAT WE SUFFER?? BROKEN BODIES, WOUND, FULLS OF SCARS, HUMILATION…IS IT WORTH IT? HONESTLY I DON’T KNOW BECAUSE I CAN’T SEE ANYHTING NOW…I’M FLYING BLIND…I DON’T KNOW THEY WANT TO BE FRIENDS WITH ME…OR I AM TO BLIND TO SEE THIS FRIENDSHIP? I DON’T KNOW MY STRENGTH OR MY ABILITY IS USEFUL AT THIS COLLEGE THE REASON WAS FIRST TIME I CAME TO THIS CLASS, AUTOMATICALLY I’VE JUST BECAME LONER, CLASS JOKER,DULL, WHY CAN’T WE BE HAPPY????? I WANT TO STUDY, TO LEARN, TO MAKE FRIENDS, TO BECOME A GOOD FRIEND, AND NOW EVERYBODY WANT TO BE “BAD BOY” SO THEY CAN CLOSE TO GIRLS…  QUITE FRANKLY, I CAN’T CHANGE MYSELF INTO A BAD BOY THAT WOULD BE BREAKING MY PROMISE TO MY FAMILY AND MYSELF… SO THAT’S WHY THEY SAY NICE GUYS FINISH LAST… AND I’M GOING TO PROVE THEM WRONG…ONCE AND FOR ALL...I DON’T WANT BE ANYTHING OTHER THAN ME….